We know, we know

Ok, so we have been bad....

The fact of the matter is this road trip has been hectic. A non-stop tour. We just have not had time to blog.

That and we are procrastinators.

So, we have a few days up in the lovely town of Telluride, Colorado and we are going to work on it now. You should see the posts below this one as we backdate them to the appropriate date.

But don't worry, we are alive, maybe missing a few organs, but alive.

Oh, and for all you doubters, the car made it up the Rockies.

“A quaint little German town…”

Gatlinburg, TN- Nestled discreetly among the vast, untouched splendor of the Great Smoky Mountains lays one of America’s best kept (and tackiest) secrets. For those wishing to experience the glory of our nation’s most visited national park without having to forfeit access to wax museums and over-the-top Christian musicals, Gatlinburg, Tennessee is nothing short of a godsend; and for the rest of us, it is at least a source of splendid blog-fodder. We had first heard of Gatlinburg in our travel guide, which described it intriguingly as “A quaint little German town, standing at the feet of the Smokies”. Unfortunately, this description proved to be a bit off the mark. For starters, the town is not in any obvious way German. Whatever Germanic charm it may have once possessed has long since been replaced by chain restaurants and novelty t-shirt stores and…mullets (in fairness, we only actually saw seven mullets and one of them—the blue one—was most certainly a wig). Also, if Gatlinburg has any particular European flavor (it doesn’t), this flavor would be decidedly Russian: Due to a bustling slave trade (thinly disguised as a summer work program) the majority of the town’s service positions are staffed by friendly Siberian FOBs, further lending to the bizarness of the place. In all, there is much to do in (and even more to say about) Gatlinburg, Tennessee and we are definitely glad to have visited; however, its elaborate offerings amount to little more than a distraction from the region’s true attraction—the Great Smokey Mountains. Below are some pictures of the Smokies, the campsite we stayed at, and of course, Gatlinburg, the place that taste forgot…

Matt
The Top of Clingman's Dome, the highest point in TN

One of the scenic local attractions...
It's a time honored tradition to be welcomed into the Great Smoky Mountains National Park by a group of overweight children..."Hey look, that kid's got bosoms!"
(Ed. Note: How many of those kids do you think have two first names? NJL)

So Busy....

I know that all of you are waiting for more fun and interesting posts from japan, but I am just so crazy here, and dont have much time left. Dont worry though, I will write long and interesting posts in the week that I am in town, telling you all about my adventurs in Tokyo, Osaka and Kyoto.

Take Care, will see you all shortly.

Food...

Throughout my travels in this world, and in my home city of New York, I have had some amazing meals. Simple baguettes in Paris, killer taco`s in LA, spicy vegetable patties in the Himalayas, back to the basic Papaya King hot dog, I have eaten some great food in my few years on this earth. Lately, I have been lucky enough to dive headlong into amazing Thai and Indonesian cuisine, that while spicy and uncomplex, has been amazing all the same.

However, all the meals in my life have been overshadowed in the 5 days that I have been in Japan.

The fact of the matter is that Japanese are perfectionist. They take anything and everything, and improve it. Take for instance, Ramen. Anybody who has attend college in the last 10 years can tell you stories of subsisting on Ramen noodles. It is a simple Chinese dish that is basically noodles in some sort of broth. Nothing Crazy.

However the Japanese took that and made it into the most amazing fast food imaginable. On almost every block in Tokyo there is a Ramen Shop, where for less then $7 you can get a bowl of amazing ramen topped with pork and vegetables in a broth that could be considered devine. The pork is always cooked to perfection, falling apart in your mouth. Everything is fresh and delicious. It is unbelievably good.

I almost cant talk about the Sushi. I can say now that you have not really tried Sushi till you have come to Japan. I was walking in Ueno, which is in the north-east of Tokyo, when I came across a small sushi place next to a fish market. It was just a hole in the wall that jutted out onto the street with the assistance of a few tarps. There were stools and a few Formica tables. Large coolers of cold tea sat in the corners. As the rain fell outside I was brought a bowl of rice with Tuna and Toro on top. A small dish of soy sauce with a little wasabi.

I can say that it was one of the pinnacles of dining.

The Tuna was so tender I didn't even need to chew. You could cut it with your tongue. The rice, perfectly cooked. It mixed perfectly with the cold tea and the rain.

Tokyo is truly a food lovers paradise.

Nerdvana

Akihabara, Land o the nerds.

Imagine, if you will, an area the size of Time Square, filled to the brim with Electronic stores, Used Computer Parts, Manga (Japanese comic) shops, classic video game retailers, arcades and anything else a self-respecting Nerd could want. Throw in some Maid Cafes (dont ask) and you have Akihabara. For me, its kind of like being a diabetic in a candy store. Everything Looks so good but its all in Japanese. Still, there are a million things I would love to have. On my way back through Tokyo I will have to go on a little bit of a shopping spree.

Lately, it has become a little over hyped, with tourists and ordinary Japanese coming to gawk at the crazy outfits and frolicking kids. Also, the fact that in early June a young troubled Japanese kid decided to go on a rampage and killed 6 people with a knife has killed the vibe somewhat. There is a memorial now, and it is covered in flowers and, fittingly, caffeinated beverages. However, the place was still hopping when I dropped by. Teens dressed as their favorite comic book charters, girls in their maid/lolita/goth outfits, crazy sales people screaming Japanese into the crowd.

One place I had to go first was Super Potato, land of all things retro and Nintendo. They blast old video game soundtracks out on the street, making it very easy to find in the back alleys. Three floors of almost everything ever made by Nintendo as well as several other Japanese video game manufacturers. It is impressive.

By now your thinking, "wow Noah, your a nerd." Dam Right.

Wet and Wild in Hong Kong...Ok, maybe just wet

My two days in Hong Kong went by fast. There was so much I wanted to do, and most of it was co-opted by the endless downpour that blanketed the city for my entire time there. I finally witnessed blue in the sky on my way to the airport to fly to Tokyo.

Hong Kong is massive, like Manhatten in a vertical sense, but even more so. Many resturants and stores are on the second or third floors of buidings, making it neccessary to look up to see what you might be passing. Every other buiding is a shopping mall. The whole of Central is one big mall connected by covered skyways which were invalbul to me transversing the district without becoming soked to the bone. As soon as I left central to expore more of the city, I became a drowned rat.

I really did not have that much time, and the rain precluded many activities, so I spent my time trying to do some shopping and eating amazing Chinese food.

Anyway, now I am in Tokyo. Soon I will post about my trips to Akihabara, Land of the Nerd. Take care.

Sunburn, my old friend

Ouch.

Ouch Ouch Ouch.

OUCH.

I am whats called a day-walker, a half ginger. Thus, sitting out in the sun for a few hours is an iffy proposition. Seeming as I have been in Southeast Asia for almost a month and I have not picked up much of a tan, I decided to grin and burn it.

So, I am learning to love the red.

Ouch.

Ubud, Monkeys and Sharp Objects.

I just got back to Kuta from Ubud. I have to say it was a nice 3 days.

Ubud is up in the mountains, surrounded by terraced rice patties and winding river valleys. However, it is not a destination you visit for the nightlife. After going to bed at 10 pm 3 nights in a row, I had enough. The activities during the day are just wandering the town, looking at shops and visiting temples in the jungle.

One of the cool local attractions is a monkey forrest. If you have ever heard my stories about India, I might have told you about the monkeys there. No matter how cute monkeys look, in reality they are vicious little beasts. The monkeys in India were psychotic kleptomaniacs. Women had to take their earrings out before they went near them or else the monkeys would tear them out.

The Ubud monkeys were much nicer. They would only attack you for your food. I saw a monkey jump a Dutch woman looking for the cookie hidden in her pocket. They are funny to watch, though. They just play fight the whole time, jump on each other's backs and knock each other off stairs. When they get bored with that they end up going to torture the few deer who live in a pen in the forrest, jumping on their backs and stealing their food. Its like a Three Stooges episode.

After I visited the Monkey Forrest, there was not much to do in town, and getting bored, I decided to try to improve my self by taking a class in local skills. For some reason, instead of taking a nice course in Balinese Instruments or Cooking, I decided to do wood carving.

Now, to educated those of you not in the Levine Clan, our family has a bit of a dicey history with sharp objects. There are several stories, one involving a tennis ball, another involving vegetables, which ended in trips to the hospital for those involved. Therefor, putting a razor sharp chisel in one hand and a heavy wooden mallet in the other might not have been the smartest move.

Now, if we had been using a proper workbench, I might have only been at risk of loosing a finger. However, how the Balinese do woodcarving is sitting on the floor. They sit, holding the piece of wood between their feet, legs bent at 90 degrees and knees to the ground, hunched over like they were stretching their groin. Now, try doing that. For the women out there, did it hurt? Men, I'm not even going to ask you if it hurt, because more than likely you are slaying to your self that its impossible for anybody with external reproductive organs.

Anyway, instead of possibility of coming back from this trip known as Nine Finger Noah, with a minor slip I might have taken out an ankle, a knee, or a much more important piece of equipment.

I escaped with only a minor scrape on my foot. It was fun though, although my piece of wood only came out OK with the great help of the instructor, who was some sort of contortionist the way he sat.

Anyway, back in Kuta now, I think I will spend the week before I leave sitting by the pool, relaxing before the craziness of Hong Kong and Japan.

Obama and Cultural Objections

I don't like to go into politics on a travel blog, but here it goes...

As I was eating my breakfast a few days ago, I happened to see Obama's victory speech on CNN after winning the primary. I think everybody who I have spoken to here has been thrilled that he won. Although the politics at this point are very tricky, I have a feeling that he will find a way to pick his Vice President without causing too many waves.

Now, on to something more on point. A good rant.

On a survey of cultures world-wide, the Balinese are very far up on the niceness scale . However, no matter how low key and polite they may be, there is one habit that really bugs the crap out of me.

You might not have noticed, but in most restaurants in the world, when somebody places a bill in front of you, the waiter comes and takes the money, and then goes of to the registrar to count it and give you change. These little acts of trust, that you are giving the right amount of money, are common in any country I have been in.

In Bali, it is the complete opposite. In restaurants big and small, expensive or cheep, the waiter makes a point of counting your money right at the table, standing over you. One time I left money on the table, and the waiter stopped me to count the money in front of me before he let me get up and leave.

I don't know what it is, but this little fact has been nagging in my head the whole time I have been in Bali. I try to put it off as over-reacting. No matter how many times I say to myself that it is cultural thing, the fact that a people can be so nice, and yet never trust a person enough to pay for what they have bought, is enough to set me on edge.

Anyway, that's all I have for today. Have a wonderful night (day for you).

Surf's Up, Mate

So many Aussies. If I hear "mate" one more time I will start throwing bottles. I would love to see an Australian and a Canadian get into a fight:

"I'm not your mate, buddy!"
"I'm not your buddy, mate!"
(Please see South Park episode about Canada on Strike for the reference)

Kuta, in Bali, is beautiful. The climate is similar to Florida: 80 degree weather with not too much humidity. Tropical plants, great surf at the beach, and good restaurants everywhere. Also, like the Thais they leash their cows.

Things are ridiculously cheep too. A Bintang (the local Beer Chang here) costs around a $0.85. A nice hotel with a pool, AC, hot water and cable TV goes for less than $20 a night. Dinner might set you back $3.50.

So basically, when Ft. Lauderdale fills up, expect to hear Yiddish spoken here.

The one really annoying thing about Bali is there love of bad american music. It's just that a lot of restaurants tend to think that bringing in a band is a draw. However, when said band is butchering a Third Eye Blind tune while your trying to eat, and it gets a little annoying. Switch that an Evanescence song, and you just might want to go find a coconut to throw.

I support upcoming musical talent, just not when I am trying to eat.

I tried surfing a few days ago. Lots of fun, if I could just learn to stand up. It was great exercise though, you really feel it in your chest the next day. I am actually getting a nice tan here, something rare for me.

I am off to Ubud in a few days. It is up in the jungle about an hour and half away from here. Known as a center for Balinese arts, it is suppose to be very relaxing. Woodstock in Bali?

Off to the beach, see you later.

Last Thoughts on Thailand: 7-Eleven's, How I hate Roosters, and A Fancy Dinner

The last few days have been a bit hectic. I finished off my advanced certification and caught a boat back from Ko Tao to the mainland, and then a 7 hour bus ride back to Bangkok. Although I had good luck going down, coming back was not so fun. It was during the day, so I could not sleep through the whole trip. Also, I was stuck on the lower level of the bus, right next to a Swede who hand not showered in a few days. So, that was a blast.

As a wallow away my final hours in Bangkok, a few minor quarks about Thailand will always stick in my mind:

Thailand is chock full of 7-Eleven's. No, really. Every town I went through, big or small had one. Unfortunately, no Slurpee's.

Also, if you want people to quit smoking, putting pictures of people with huge facial tumors or in the throws of dieing from lung cancer on the front of the packs really helps. Trust me.

Transvestites here are really convincing. They put the NY ones to shame. Apparently, most take hormones and have their adams apple removed. Its enough to frighten you off Thai women for life.

Roosters suck. You get all of these wonderful loony-toon visions of roosters waking up people on a farm for a hard days work. Unfortunately, when they are crowing repeatedly at 5 in the moring when you are trying to sleep off a Chang-over (a particularly nasty hangover caused by drinking too much Beer Chang), they start to get on your nerves. I usually have a strong desire for fried chicken the next day.

You can find anything in Bangkok. Iron Man DVD? Got it. Illegal Computer Software? 2 for 1. Armani knockoff suit? Hand tailored my main man. Fake International Press Pass? Just bring a passport photo.

My final dinner in Bangkok was at this wonderful place called Eat Me. Amazing meal at Thailand prices. Did a very interesting thing with ham and melon by adding a sherry based sauce. The whole meal was amazing.

Anyway, Bangkok has been a blast, but its time to head to Bali. Will write shortly.

Cousteau ain't got shit on me...

Ko Tao is quite a beautiful place. Although I don't like it as much as The Sanctuary, there is a lot more to do here besides just sit in a hammock. Not that there is anything wrong with being lazy, but 5 days is enough to let me relax and get into a swing of things. I have been a little more active here.

Diving is the real industry here on Ko Tao. Every other storefront is a dive shop, making it one of the cheapest places in the world to get your diving certification done. Not to mention that the dives around here are great. I have spent the last week weaving in and out of beautiful coral reefs.

I just finished my basic diving certification two days ago, and today started my advanced course. Tomorrow morning I have a big dive that I have been looking froward too. Until now, the deepest I have gone is 12 Meters. The dive tomorrow is down to 30 meters, at a place called Southwest Pinnacle far out from Ko Tao. After that, I have another dive in the afternoon, and then one more on Sunday to finish my Advanced Certification.

Diving is quite a peaceful thing to do, floating weightless above the coral. At first your body thinks its drowning, and you want to suck in air as much as possible. After you fight your instinct to panic and reach the bottom, everything is effortless.

Ko Tao is a nice place, a little crazy at night though. Apparently in the last year there has been a great influx of Thai Lady-boys who have set up a cabaret in town. You cant go anywhere without a transvestite handing you a pamphlet. There are also the standard bars you find in any big backpacker town: reggae, posh, surfer (diver here) and old hippy. I have been hanging out in the bar run by the dive school I am attending. It is right on the beach, and serves great Thai food.

I have developed a great liking to Thai beer. Beer Chang, which has a really cool double elephant logo, seems to be the preferred beer around here. Singa and Tiger are tied as good backups. The only other beer they serve seems to be Heineken, and nobody drinks that. For less than 3 bucks you get a big bottle of Chang, equal to about 3 standard beers. However, Beer Lao, which I have not been able to to get a hold of yet, by general consensus is one of the best beers in Asia. Unfortunately, its hard to find outside of Laos. I have to find a bottle in Bangkok before I head on.


Having a great time here. I should be back in Bangkok on Monday. My flight leaves for Bali on Thursday.

Gary's Bar and the Animal Kingdom in my Bathroom

Friday night was my last night at The Sanctuary, although there was not much sleeping involved. Every Friday there is a large party up the beach at this place called Gary's Bar, where the music goes until around 8am, and it is so loud that even if you wanted to go back to your room and sleep, you would be kept up by the music. I went out with a bunch of people who I had met, and it was a pretty good showing, with the usual Ko Pha Nang fire spinners and neon painted dancers. I ended up leaving around 4am, to sleep two hours before I started packing.

On an side note, I might not have mentioned that the Sanctuary is really in the back end of beyond. Like, in the jungle. This leads to a lot of interesting animal life that tends to hang around the premises. The first night I was there, the usefulness of my mosquito net became very apparent. As I am so tall my feet stuck out the end of it, I woke up with feet covered in bites. I learned to curl up in a ball after that.

The family of lizards living below my hut were quite nice. They had sticky fingers that they used to run up and down the walls of my bungalow on a regular basis. The biggest one was over a foot long.

But in the craziest things always ended up in my bathroom, which was out behind the bungalow. Always there was some type of bug running around. They sprayed the entire area for Mosquito's the day after I arrived, and this caused a mass genocide of little moths lining the floor. At first I thought they were leaves, and then I was thankful that I was wearing flip flops. One morning I went to the bathroom to find a very large spider sitting on my toilet seat. I sprayed it with the shower head and off it went. The last morning I was there I was greeted by a bullfrog the size of a softball.

The Sanctuary was very relaxing, but I am off on Ko Tao now to try SCUBA diving.

Paradise Lost and Found

First, the bad...

9 Hours on a night bus, finally arriving on the coast. I boarded a high speed catamaran for the 2 1/2 hour trip to Ko Pha Nang. I was sitting downstairs, and suddenly the sea started to pick up. I realized that I needed a breath of fresh air, so I went up to the top deck. The problem with this was I had forgotten my sunscreen in my bag that was checked below. Ooops.

So I look like a giant tomato.

The good is the place I am staying is so laid back, I can just hang out and slowly recover.

The Sanctuary, where I am staying is just a 10 minute longtail boat ride from Had Rinn, a town on the southern peninsula of Ko Pha Nang. More famous for the full moon parties they have there, Had Rinn is a wild town with the usual backpacker bars and beach parties. The Sanctuary is completely the opposite. Low key to an extreme, I have a bungalow high on the slope of the hill above the bay, with a great hammock. The place is almost completely isolated, with a few small hotels in the adjoining coves. There is a great vegetarian restaurant right on the beach which has a great family vibe. Its exactly what I needed to chill out.

Most likely this weekend I will hop a boat to Ko Tao to start doing my Dive training. It seems that Ko Tao is a very popular place, and I am sure I will have a good time there.

Jet lag sucks, but its not as bad as getting kicked in the head...

So, I have fought over the last few days to get my sleep schedule caught up to Bangkok time, and I have finally made it. Unfortunately, I am leaving tonight on a night bus south, so I have missed a lot of the nightlife while I was here in Bangkok. I will try to go out when I am back in town before my flight to Bali.

However, waking up between 2-3 AM most nights has had a few benefits. One of them being ending up going for breakfast at 6am, and running into the people who have been drinking all night. They inevitably invite me over for a drink, which leads to pretty interesting conversations. Yesterday morning, I was talking to a drunk Aussie for over an hour about comparative legal issues and whether the alcohol the place was serving him was bootleg Jagermeister. Eventually he joined his friend at the next table who was with some interestingly dressed Thai ladies, and I went back to my cornflakes.

I have gotten out, as the weather has been good (well, not raining. The heat is a bitch). Saturday I ended up going over to China Town, which has some interesting markets and good Dim Sum. Yesterday I went to Chatuchak, a huge market. I must have seen everything sold at Crate and Barrel, at about 1/8th the price. The food stalls there are great, amazing Thai food of all types. Unfortunately, the more interesting tourist attractions are a little busy due to a holiday that is going on right now that has something to do with the harvest, so I will try to hit them on the way back.

Last night I ended up going to the Muay Thai stadium to see a few matches. Most of the fighters are between 100-120 pounds, not a ounce of fat on them. It is pretty impressive to see these guys go at it. The most interesting fight of the night was between Rungroch from the Loogphorpoojedeehak Gym (try saying that five times fast), and Nong Mike from the Por.Saengprapia Gym. Both weighed 127 pounds, the heaviest fighters of the night. Late in the first round, Nong Mike put a heavy kick into Rungroch's stomach, causing him to double over in pain and start to fall to the mat. Before the ref could get in between them, Nong Mike landed a knee to the face that sent Rungroch's mouth guard - and likely a few of his teeth - into the ringside crowd made up mostly of tourists. Needles to say, they brought out a stretcher.

(BTW, whoever runs that stadium must have been to Madison Square Garden, because the charge just as much for a beer.)

I am on a overnight bus tonight to Chumphon, and a boat tomorrow morning to Koh Phangan. I will try to write when I get settled in there.

NJL

The Japanese stole my Single Malt and the (thankfully) missing cows

Well, here I am, all alone in Bangkok.

First, the flight..
I had to fly through Tokyo, with a nice 3 hour layover for sushi and beer. Unfortunately, I didn't know that you could not bring Duty Free from America onto a connecting flight and I had picked up a nice bottle of Single Malt on my way over. It was either give it up or go through customs and then have the bottle (by itself) checked as a bag. I think that 40 bucks is not to much to pay to avoid customs, so now some Tokyo airport security officer is drinking my scotch.

I feel like an idiot.

Besides that it was your standard 24 strait hours on a plane cramped between crying babies and old Japanese men snoring.

After landing in bangkok, I hopped a cab to Koh San Road, the main backpacker drag. Needless to say, it is a lot like the main backpacker ghetto in Delhi, except for a few, key differences...

1: Large quantities of booze, and the drunk people the usually accompany it.
2: A lot cleaner.
3: The touts are much less pushy.
4: The absence of cows.

You have to understand, the 4th point is a big deal. The Indians let the cows run wild, and they end up eating all the plastic bags lying around. This tends to kill them, leaving rotting Cow carcases all over the place. Not pleasant at all.

Anyway, you could see Koh San coming with the presence of Europeans everywhere, and then suddenly your on something that is like a mix between a Hong Kong back ally and the Vegas Strip. Drunk people everywhere, food stalls selling all manner of goodies, neon signs painting everyone lurid shades of green and pink. After finding a place to crash for the night, I went out side for a beer and crispy pork wantons. I had a nice conversation with a pack of Swedes, who were telling me about their exploits up in Cambodia. From what I hear, although a little wet, it is a blast up there.

I, however, am heading south first. The next few days will be just adjusting to the time change and checking out the sights. I think by Monday I will try to hop a train south to the islands.

The trip of a lifetime…or lifetimes, depending on your religion

Sometimes, I wonder how I suddenly found a love for traveling. I guess it is the excitement just before you step onto the plane for that 10+ hour flight to a far-flung land you never would have thought you would have seen. I get that feeling every time, and keep it for the length of my trip. Having that thrill every minute, not knowing what might be around the next corner, is what drives me on these long trips. I have never been a fan of the one week vacation. By the time you have figured out what you like about a place, you have to head home.

The two years since my last great adventure have been wonderful. Work has kept me occupied, but the thought of law school just around the corner is intimidating. I need to get one big hurrah in before I plunge back into school and then another job. New York, no matter how much I love it, wears on me after a while. It’s time to sneak out of town and take a peek at the outside.

The vacation I am about to embark on is actually two trips, with a quick break in-between. This sort of happened naturally, seeming as there is so much to see. Trip one with be me and my backpack journeying over much of Southeast Asia and parts of Japan. Bangkok, Ko Samui, Angkor Wat, Bali, and Tokyo are defiantly on the itinerary and depending on time constraints/airline routing I may be seeing Singapore, Hong Kong, Kuala Lumpur, Jakarta, or Lombok. I should leave mid May, and be back by the middle of July. Trip two is all about the road. The good old Honda needs a new home, as I will not need a car in law school and it can’t take another winter of rusting in Uncle Ken’s driveway. So two friends and I are going to drive it out to California, having a blast on the way. We will leave mid-July and pull into L.A. by the end of the first week in august. It is a journey that every American should do, even just to get an idea of how big the country really is.

And so, I am starting to plot and plan. With my job ending in just two months, and my future assured by acceptance to law school, I am chomping at the bit to get out.